Atrocious Table Manners
(Written by Chris; Level: Advanced)
Alfredo: Whoa! This is a real classy joint. The waiters are all dressed to the nines. I can’t wait to sink my teeth into the food.
Finn: I hear ya, my stomach is rumbling. The lobster comes highly recommended, and I have heard excellent things about the filet mignon.
Alfredo: Just thinking about it makes my mouth water! When are the dishes going to come? I am so hungry I could eat a horse. (Picks up silverware and starts banging loudly on the table).
Finn: Settle down, Alfredo. Just be patient. Ah! Here it comes now. (The waiter brings out the food).
Alfredo: (Loudly) Finally! It’s about time!
Finn: (After the waiter leaves) Why did you say that in front of the waiter? We only ordered twenty minutes ago.
Alfredo: Oh! Who cares? (Takes a big bite, and chews his food with his mouth open)
Finn: Were you raised in a barn? Please close your mouth when you chew.
Alfredo: This steak is really scrumptious, maybe the best I’ve ever tasted! (Food comes out of his mouth as he talks).
Finn: You eat like a pig! Didn’t your mother ever tell you to never talk with your mouth full?
Alfredo: We always had dinner in front of the TV. I can’t get over how great this food is! (Smack, smack, smack)
Finn: My goodness, you are a noisy eater! I know your parents raised you better than this. Where are your manners?
Alfredo: (Licking his fingers) Why are you looking at me like that?
